Osteopsychosis

Similar in pronunciation but unrelated to Osteoporosis, a physical disability that is common in older people, Osteopsychosis mainly affects males in their teens and early 20’s. Sometimes referred to by its derived name, “Bonehead,” Osteopsychosis is indicated by unusually stupid behavior, the type of behavior that is often the subject matter of movies targeted at adolescents — the Jackass movie franchise, for example.

More recently, Osteopsychosis has become associated with followers of pseudoscientific theories (e.g., astrology, numerology, UFOlogy), bizarre and often dangerous religions (e.g., Branch Davidians, Heaven’s Gate, Peoples Temple) and the particular American political disposition called the Tea Party.

Though teenaged males are overwhelmingly the sufferers of Osteopsychosis, this microdisorder has been identified in populations on every continent and in people involved in all walks of life. Osteopsychosis knows no boundaries of race, religion, gender, sexual orientation, education, financial status, height, weight, shoe size or age.


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MANAGEMENT
Many behavioral, regenerative, episodic, cognitive, alternative, existential and even experimental therapies have been tried in the treatment of Osteopsychotic behavior. None, however, have proven successful. To date, the only process that has been shown to be 100 percent effective in permanently controlling the consequences of Osteopsychosis is death.

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